Over the years many of the couples who I have married have asked for rituals to be included in their ceremony ... here are a few examples

The Wine Box

This is a text I copied from internet, though not in my words it gives you a good idea of what it is all about ....


Love Letter & Wine Box Ceremony

Here’s an idea that will certainly grab the attention of the guests, add some pizzazz to your ceremony and incorporate a new twist into your celebration. NOTE: If you don’t want to put wine in the box, that’s fine. Just the love letters or whatever else you would like will work just as well.

Here is what you will need:

A wooden wine box
a bottle of your favorite wine
two love letters sealed in separate envelopes

A few weeks before the wedding, take some time to each write a letter to one another, expressing your thoughts about the good qualities that you found in your future partner, the reasons for falling in love with them and your hopes and dreams for the future. In other words, you write a
“love letter” to each other and place it in a sealed envelope, with the name of your partner on the outside. Do not read what the other has written.

Be creative with the box by putting foam inside to support the wine bottle. Line the inside with satin material. You can also include CDs of your favorite music, favorite pictures of you together, and other mementos making it your own romantic time capsule. Keep the box in a place of honor as a constant visual reminder of your love and commitment to each other. The box can be a life preserver in years to come.

The Wine Box should be opened on your 5th wedding anniversary.

There is only one other reason the box should be opened before your anniversary. If there should come a time when you hit a bumpy road in your relationship, before you give up or make any irrational decisions, open the Wine Box. The hope is that there will never be a reason to have to open the box except on your anniversary!

Hit a rough spot in your relationship? Sit down together, open the box, uncork the wine and unseal the envelopes that you wrote for one another before your wedding, go to separate rooms and quietly read the love letter.

Even if you are not seeing eye-to-eye at that very moment, it will remind you of all the reasons you choose this person as your partner and all the things that helped shape the life they’ve created together. Never take your blessings of being together for granted.

The romantic sentiments you wrote, the declaration of love, the clear thoughts about why you chose this person as your life partner will help put you back on even ground. This is the perfect ritual to remind you of your wedding day and your intention to love and cherish each other in good times and bad for as long as you both shall live.

Toward the end of your ceremony the Officiant will state the purpose of the “Love Letter & Wine Box Ceremony.”

The Officiant will elaborate on the reasons for the sealed love letters, place the sealed envelopes in with the wine bottle and will speak about the exercise that you went through. It should be emphasized that the letters have not been read by the Officiant or by anyone else.

If you use a custom made wine box with two keys, the bride and groom each use a key and lock the box.

Your guests will be pleased to have been a witness to something so unique and different at your wedding ceremony.

•• •
Love Letter & Wine Box Ceremony
Minister: _____ and _____ have chosen as a couple to perform a Love Letter & Wine Box ceremony.

This box contains a bottle of wine, two glasses, and a love letter from each to the other. The letters describe the good qualities they find in one another, the reasons they fell in love, and their reasons for choosing to marry. The letters are sealed in individual envelopes and they have not seen what the other has written. You have created your very own “romantic” time capsule to be opened on your 5th wedding anniversary.

I recommend that you keep the box in a place of honor prominently displayed in your home as a constant reminder of your commitment to each other.

Minister: _____ and _____ should you ever find your marriage enduring insurmountable hardships, you are to as a couple, open this box, sit and drink the wine together, then separate and read the letters you wrote to one another when you were united as a couple in marriage. By reading these love letters you will reflect upon the reasons you fell in love and chose to marry each other here today.

The hope is, however, that you will never have a reason to open this box. And if this is the case, you are to open this box to share and enjoy on your 5th year wedding anniversary!


This is what I took from internet, the 5 year part can be changed to one year or whatever you two decide ... I have carried out this ritual in many many weddings now and it has always been well received. 

Friendship candle

A very simple idea whereby one candle is lit by the bride and groom and the light is then passed around throughout the people present. Everyone has a candle under their chair which they retreave and light from their neighbour. Meanwhile I would read a text along the lines of:


It is often said that it is love that makes the world go round. However, without doubt, it is friendship that keeps our spinning existence on an even keel. True friendship provides so many of the essentials for a happy life - it is the strong foundation on which to build an enduring relationship, it is the mortar which bonds us together in harmony, and it is the calm, warm protection we sometimes need when the world outside seems cold and chaotic. True friendship holds a mirror to our foibles and failings, without destroying our sense of worthiness. True friendship nurtures our hopes, supports us in our disappointments, and encourages us to grow to our best potential. XXX and YYY come together as friends. Today, they pledge to each other not only their love, but also the strength, warmth and, most importantly, the fun of true friendship."



Sand Ceremony

There are many variations upon this theme, basically the idea is to mix together two substances that can never be undone, be it wine, coloured water or sand. Being a wine lover I don't suggest mixing two different wines together since it is more like  creating a bad sangria than joining together two people forever. With the sand ceremony the idea is that there are two different coloured sands which are poured in to a third larger container by the bride and groom while I would read somehting like this (having explained the significance of the ritual beforehand):


"XXX and YYY, you have just sealed your relationship by giving and receiving of rings and vows, committing yourselves to one another throughout your lives. This is a great and good commitment and we here present have all witnesses it. Today, this relationship is symbolized through the pouring of these two individual containers of sand, one representing you, XXX, all that you were, all that you are, and all that you will ever be, and the other representing you, YYY, all that you were, all that you are, and all that you will ever be. Take the sand and start pouring!!!!

As these two containers of sand are poured into a third container, the individual containers of sand will no longer exists, but will be joined together as one. Just as these grains of sand can never be separated and poured again into the individual containers, so will your marriage be."